HUMAN2HUMAN

A TREATISE ON THE ART AND SCIENCE OF PERSONAL TRANSFORMATION. Bipolar I Depressive. In my early thirties that was my current situation. Finally, a name for my pain. “It’s like diabetes.” They said. “You can treat it with medication and talk therapy.” They said. “It is manageable.” They said. “You will have it for Life.” They said. They also said that I had a 1 in 5 chance of ending my own life. That is a 20% likelihood that on any given day, I will pull my own plug. That shed a lot of light, on an infinite amount of darkness. I am here, to tell you that if you are mentally ill, struggle with depression, anxiety, or addiction – if you do not – Adapt, Evolve, you will die before your time and before you know what hit you. Furthermore, if you deem yourself a stable genius the same applies. Depression will pull you down. Anxiety pushes you down. Addiction will burn you alive. Bipolar I Depressive will pull you apart, burn you alive, push you down, pull you down drown you,...

YOU ARE OUT THERE, SHOW YOURSELF! I know we are in trying times. The country is in tumult. Brother against brother, sister against sister, and friend against friend. What are we to do? HOW ABOUT WE TRY AND SEE THINGS FROM ANOTHER'S PERSPECTIVE? We are all in the same boat. We can turn a blind eye to the proverbial iceberg ahead or we can steer away and clear of the impending catastrophe ahead. We know its there, we do, but we do not know what it is or what it looks like. Remember that phrase - Those who do not know their history are doomed to repeat it. Well, folks, we are on the precipice of that familiar cliff. We can walk it back or take that flying leap into the abyss of war, chaos, and famine. It is our nature. Our human nature? Or, our animal nature? We could be evolving into our divine nature. But, that takes work, sacrifice, and awareness. I am an optimist. We have so much to do and become. Science and technology are making new ...

JUST BE - THAT'S ALL THERE IS PERIOD! That's all there is to it. Easy but not simple! But how, you ask? How do I just be? Can you be present? Can you quiet your mind? Can you breathe in and then out? Can you be aware of your thoughts? Can you be mindful of your feelings? Can you stop before you act impulsively? You can. I know you can. If I can then you can too. A year and a half ago, I had a Bipolar episode. My anxiety was off the charts -I then went into a depression and it spiraled down and I hit bottom, AGAIN .  I climbed out of the hole eventually. I was fortunate that I have people who care about me. I was trying to be something I was not and when I did not succeed, I got down on myself and it all went to shit. I came off my medication. I could not eat. I could not sleep. I lost thirty pounds. That attack sent my blood sugar soaring. Now, I have that challenge to combat. No worries though. It was the best thing that could happened to me. I got up. I sto...

I was broken. I was damaged. It did not happen all at once. It started with a crack. To this day, I do not know the origin of the fracture, the fault line that slowly tore me apart and left me in pieces.  I spent a lifetime trying to figure out when, how, who, what, and where.  No more, no more. It does not matter. I assembled and united all the disparate parts and pieces and that missing piece that I could not find, space where that piece I thought would make me hole, that space – that is where the light gets in. I am OK with that.  The light that got in illuminated me from within and throughout and purged and cleansed and purified and lifted me up and onto a higher plane of awareness and experience.  What makes music beautiful is not so much the notes as the spaces, rests, pauses – so that we may breathe and value and enjoy the stillness and the emptiness so  that the sound, the light may enter occupy and envelope the fullness of the mag...

The other day I was listening to a podcast and they were discussing mental health. The question at hand was - if mental health, or a brain disorder, is caused strictly due to a chemical imbalance? The eventually landed on the idea that it is a combination of chemical imbalance and a person's emotional state. Of course, one's emotional state has a lot of different contributing factors. If a person's emotional state is not steady or stable it tends to fluctuate. Depending on the individual or one's state may cycle rapidly i.e. a person who is Bipolar may go up and down like a roller coaster. A person who is not Neuro-divergent and who is relatively healthy - mentally wise may only have a blip or a mild disappearance throughout their day. Come what may - it is similar to the chicken and the egg paradox. If someone has troubling thoughts, that may cause them to get emotionally upset. Which inturns stirs the cauldron of neurochemistry causing one to enter a state that...

Sometimes through no fault of their own, some people become Mystics. From a life-altering event, a disease, a struggle beyond imagining, a death, an insight, or a dream. Whatever the case - a change happens. The determining factor is suffering. To experience and live in a state of bliss, first, you have to spend some time in hell. It either destroys you or tempers you into a strong yet flexible weapon of truth and righteousness. Those of us that are wired a little different from the rest are challenged with the rough terrain of every day due to a chemical imbalance not taking our meds, not eating or sleeping right, let alone self-medicating - life can be a real challenge. If not life-threatening. My name is Jeff Turnbull. I am a Survivor. I have battled demons and monsters all my life. It was not until later in life that I could name them - Anxiety, Depression, Bipolar Disorder- I. I did a lot of work on myself. I am here to share with you what I have learned. I do my best to...